Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Top 10 Things I Wish I Could Make Myself Do

10. Go to the gym
9. Finish the novel I have been reading for 2 months
8. Stop Googling "pregnant no symptoms"
7. Not allow the stress of teaching to permeate every minute of my day
6. Resist the urge to call and move Monday's ultrasound to Friday
5. Cease begging SKB and other friends to talk me down off the ledge every day, when I am convinced this pregnancy will end in miscarriage
4. Eat some other food group besides carbs
3. Thoroughly clean my apartment
2. Absorb some of KG's ability to relax and go to a happy place
1. Start believing that this pregnancy will be a happy, healthy one, ending full term with a take-home baby

Big sigh.

18 comments:

  1. Big sigh sister! Right there with you. We are more alike than not. I definitely with you on the carbs and cleaning. I have dust bunnies the size of kittens. When will I feel like cleaning? Who am I any more?

    Less than one week. Wow. Time is flying.

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  2. Lady, breathe. There's currently a lot on your plate and none of it is easy. Considering your history, I think you're handling all of this very well. So stop beating yourself up.

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  3. I am right there with you. Especially number one. I also don't really have symptoms...so I think it can be normal. Let's just say that it is. Especially this early in the pregnancy.

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  4. Mmmmm. CARBS. I feel ya. I don't really have symptoms either. Praying for healthy babies and healthy mommas.

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  5. I wish we could just listen to other people and be calm...and I'm killing the carbs too!

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  6. I am so sorry you're having so much anxiety about this pregnancy but I expect nothing but the best from this pregnancy for you and I'll be waiting patiently for the good news on Monday. 'Til then, sending you lots of love.

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  7. A lack of symptoms is TOTALLY normal at this point!!!! The thing about pregnancy is that everything is normal. Symptoms, no symptoms, weight gain, weight loss...it's ridiculous! Take a deep breath. In a couple of weeks, you'll be so tired you'll barely be able to stay awake at work. Someone once told me to enjoy the days without symptoms while you can. Easier said than done, I know, but good advice. I'm keeping everything crossed for Monday! It is going to be wonderful - I know it!

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    1. P.S. Keep in mind: if everyone had symptoms, there wouldn't be a show called "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant". I'm just saying...

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    2. I wish there was a like button for this comment. :)

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  8. Good list. But keep it realistic... Carbs are delish!!!!! Yum yum!

    Good luck with Monday's ultrasound!

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  9. I was just about to post about "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"! And those babies are just fine, you know?

    I had remarkedly few symptoms all the way through. Believe in the beta. The last time you just had a stick, so beta was maybe 50 iu of hCG. You had a beta over 3000. With the absence of super painful cramping or bright red blood things are probably okay.

    And Monday is so soon!

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  10. I'm sorry you're having so much anxiety. I'm using Circle + Bloom to help with my nerves and just to generally help me relax going into cycle #2 I think it really works. There is one to calm nerves and for healthy pregnancy. Either way I hope the anxiety doesn't continue to get the best of you, Monday is so close. Hang in there.

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  11. I am with you (gym, eating, nerves, all of it). But you know what? Every day that passes brings you closer to the second trimester when the risk of miscarriage goes down. It won't be long now. Hang in there!

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  12. For some reason your posts have stopped showing up in my reader :( I would like to do all ten of those, too. Except, change "teaching" to "marketing" :)

    We have five more sleeps. We can do this.

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  13. Anne Lamott wrote a great book about the creative process called "Bird by Bird"--the title was inspired by her little brother who, as a child, had completely procrastinated a report on birds. She recalled that he sat at the kitchen table, slumped over and crying, completely overwhelmed by all of the birds he had to write about. Her father walked over to her little brother, put his arm around his shoulder, and said, "Bird by bird, son, bird by bird". Take every day of this pregnancy "bird by bird"! Just plug away day by day, try to breathe and relax, and you WILL get through to the other side. I'm very excited for you, girl.

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  14. You're doing great, and I'd also like to point out that your lack of motivation to do all those things IS a symptom. I never really got the crazy tired exhaustion, I just got the "blah.... I don't wanna do anything". You wouldn't believe how many times I skipped answering my phone and STILL haven't called people back. I pretend I'm so busy, but no I'm just feeling insanely lazy and I really do believe that's a symptom. Sounds like you got it too.

    You're so close, movies/books and DISTRACTION are key right now. I also love the comment above... "bird by bird". Hang in there girl, we're all cheering you on!!

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  15. (((hug))) This must be so, so hard--I can feel your worries from my screen. I agree with Izzy: distraction is absolutely key. Good TV shows, friends, etc.

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